Lucas Pineapple

11 Jun

My name is Lucas and I am 15; Before I was born - my dad left the scene;

As if he was charged for a crime he committed; He took off so fast - like he was acquitted;

I’d say my father’s a four-letter word; He tries to text me, but it’s so absurd;

We aren’t buddies - We’re not even close; I have no clue - as to where you might go;

I have a tumor in my own brain; But you wouldn’t know, - living your life in vain;

It’s been two years now - it’s been so long; You spent all 15 years- doing me wrong;

Now, you only text me on special occasions?; You are no factor - in my life’s equation;

Your very existence - toys with my own mind; Your games are so cruel - they only remind

Me how little you care and how lame you are; To leave me with this deep emotional scar;

I’m not yet a man, but even I know; That this is no way your kid is meant to grow

Up with no father - to stand up for him; In all fifteen years - of my own tears, I swim

I’m so mad I feel like punching a wall; You're flesh and blood - but you’re no man at all;

A real man stepped up; took Mom as his wife; While you just float in - and out my whole life; 

He’s good to me; - he’s always there; He sets me straight, but he shows me he cares;

He puts his foot down, but it’s what I need; But at least he’s been there with no tricks up his sleeve;

He always takes care - of me and my mom; You bring the storm; but he brings the calm;

You’re a tornado, destroying things in your path; And, I’m just like you; - do you feel my wrath?;

You don’t see me at all; you don’t know who I am; Texts mean nothing- you’ve never given a damn;

I can’t concentrate - I can’t even sleep; The hours of a vampire is what I now keep;

Making beats every night, I stay up until dawn; I lay down dope tracks ‘til I lay down a yawn;

I write, I rap, and produce my own pain; Music’s my outlet - that helps keep me sane;

Mom thinks I show anger - all of the time; Wouldn’t you - if your dad - committed this crime?;

I got no goals; Got no big dreams; Got no direction to nowhere, it seems;

Dear Lucas, it makes sense why you’re so mad;  Like bricks, you built years of feeling forgotten and sad;

You must feel worthless that your dad just couldn’t commit; To becoming the kind of father that sounds more legit;

You must feel so bad and feel left out of his life, Knowing you now have two half-brothers from his new wife;

So, your father wasn’t there to be a good dad; And, he’s ruined all chances - that he could have had;

I’m sure you feel pain and shame more than I know;  But it’s time to look forward and completely let go;

You must know the real problem - could - not be you;  There’s nothing you did or that you have to do;

Except to move forward and in time to forgive; Yourself for feeling shame for this life you have lived;

Most people have something ugly in their own past;  Sometimes the pain leaves, but sometimes it lasts;

Pain is like an old suitcase you take on a trip; In life there are many, so here is my tip:

You get to decide what you choose to pack;  Hope, courage, and compassion should go in your sack;

Throw in excitement, happiness, and gratitude next;  Don’t forget faith and optimism, you should go check;

A good sense of humor - love - and kindness too;  Where you go next, you’ll need them, I promise you.

Now, what’s left over to take is for you to decide;  Like all those emotions you thought you could hide;

Sadness, fear, anger, guilt, unworthiness, and shame;  You carried them all, while your father’s to blame;

But, in life you get to decide - what stays and what goes;  You decide what deserves your attention, you know;

You have the power to choose what goes with you; You can take all of your old baggage on a trip that’s brand new;

Or you can leave it all behind - and travel much lighter; With less junk to take, adventures would be so much brighter;

You have the power to be who you want to be; It’s possible to take the picture in your mind that you see;

Use that power to bring your own vision to life - somehow; For you have the power to live in the past or the now;

Don’t let fear -of not being good enough - steal- your- joy; You can be a strong, confident man; not a scared, little boy;

Don’t let anyone ever take - your unique power away;  Don’t let their problems weigh you down or cause a delay; 

You belong in this world; this world belongs to you;  So, transform this pain into something beautiful, too; 

Let it give you the strength to be the man you want to be;  Become the kind of father to a son you wished to see;

You have learned early on - what’s right from what’s wrong; You have learned early on how to write your own song;

So, write a new song with a better ending for you;  How good it would feel to be in control, too; 

It’s OK to remember - how badly you hurt;  Tragedy to triumph is for you to convert;

But tell a new story, travel down a new road;  How would it sound different from the story you’ve told?;

Take a new adventure; make a new plan; Step into the light; Be a happy, young man.

* The email will not be published on the website.